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lol to this charming emoticon)
I woke up Monday morning feeling fantastic, went to the gym had an awesome session and then about noon it hit me like a ton of bricks. I was ill, I couldn't keep anything down. It was stressful because I needed to keep my food in to keep my muscles from breaking down!
Tuesday morning I was able to eat again but I needed rest, so no gym yesterday. Lucky JD is so wonderful he wrote up a program session for me today, this way I didn't miss out on training any bodyparts.
When I wake up in the mornings I have this silly ritual of going straight to the mirror, lifting up my top and seeing whats there lol. Yesterday I think was a little preview into my comp day. Due to all the fluids I lost the day before I had a full, cut 6 pack. I actually freaked out because I looked like I lost heaps of weight overnight!
Anyway, I am better today and am in a really good head space right now too considering what I have been through. I have been working extremely hard for this comp and it has paid off because I am ahead of schedule now and am allowed to scale back a little on cardio and have a little more to eat throughout the day. I even got to have a carb meal on Sunday night woohoo. So that's great. But will she do as she's told?
At least I don't have to kill myself with each and every cardio session anymore. That takes off heaps of pressure and it allows me to really focus on my weight training which I am firing through with more PB's. I am feeling so very stronge and love my sessions more and more each day.
It's so weird being this lean lol, I have never been this way in my life and it takes some getting used to. It's funny because I have always dreamed about being thin, for as long as I can remember I thought it was the most important thing. Life would be completely different if I was thin. Lol what a joke. Life is still the same, nothing has changed except for my size. Everyone I know still treats me the same, im still me.
It really is important to be happy with who you are and not let your weight determine your happiness. Take it from someone who has been dieting from early teenage years until now. It has taken me this long to get the body I have always dreamed of thanks to Josh Dickinson's guidence I was able to do it correctly and safely. So putting the comp aside for one minute, I am happy with my new physique but I now realize I didn't have to be that down on myself before. I have lost years on being down about my weight for nothing. Just having being taught the correct way to eat is a gift for me. I know I can maintain a healthy weight and be the size I "want" to be. It wont be this size that's for sure!
I want a boob job!!!! I have lost them :-( a major downer that.
As for the comp, I have to tell you things have changed for me in that respect too. The only thing that was important to me when I started the comp prep at 16 weeks out was, "I want to place", I so badly wanted a trophy. And I can't believe this but that dosen't worry me anymore. I have won my own comp, I have acheived something I never thought I could. So when I do get on stage in 3 and half weeks, it will be to try and overcome something else I could never do, and thats stand up in front of a crowd! This is terrifing for me but I have to do this. And I really want to try and enjoy the experience.
I can't believe how much I have grown through this experience. I moved here (Gold Coast) on the 7th October last year. And if anyone had of told me on that day that I would be competing in the INBA exactly one year to the day, I would have wet myself laughing at them.
But little did I know what was around the corner. Josh Dickinson has helped change my life, and blog world has kept the momentum of it going.
I have made awesome friends here and look forward to seeing more of your guys in person.
